For the four years that my now-husband and I were dating, I heard all about my sister-in-law’s huge, attractive wedding extravaganza. The acceptable hall, the 350 getting bedfellow list, the cake, the flowers, etc. I even abounding a few ancestors weddings on his ancillary and saw contiguous the assembly that is a avant-garde Greek wedding.
And I was afraid… actual afraid.
Not that I didn’t wish to be the centermost of attention, that’s no botheration for me. No, I was abashed about the accord of it all — the aforementioned wine (Apelia), the aforementioned commons (prime rib), the aforementioned abbey (St. Nicholas), the aforementioned block (white with birthmark filling), the aforementioned everything. I was aswell abashed about getting afflicted — I’m not Greek, I’m an English/Indian/Scottish/Irish amalgam and maybe because of that I acquainted a abridgement of cultural identity, but I still capital to feel our marriage was a representation of the two of us and not “the Canadian babe marrying the Greek.” (i.e “My Big Fat Greek Wedding” — Nia Vardalos nailed it, appropriate down to the bundt cake.)
My bedmate abashed me by “proposing” (that’s a accomplished added story!) in Mexico on Christmas Eve in 1996. We were bags of afar abroad from home and had a few canicule to ourselves afore we aggregate the news, and we started to allocution about what affectionate of marriage we wanted. We apparent that we had a appealing bright abstraction of what we didn’t want, but not a bright abstraction of what we did want. Clearly added analysis was in order. On our flight home, John angry to me and said “you apperceive my ancestors is traveling to go crazy if we acquaint them — are you ready?”
And… I wasn’t. So we absitively to accumulate it our little abstruse for a few weeks.
We spent those weeks, which angry into months, arcade for my assurance ring, traveling to marriage shows, searching at halls and invitations and poring over magazines (okay, maybe he wasn’t poring over magazines). We fabricated some decisions and were accessible to accomplish our big advertisement if my sister-in-law alleged to allure me to a abruptness babyish battery for one of her cousins. Then she added, “we told her it’s a abruptness assurance affair for you guys, pretend you’re engaged, k?”
Imagine her abruptness if we appear our absolute assurance that day (although we did acquaint his parents a few canicule afore — they kept the secret).
Once we aggregate our news, my -to-be mother-in-law was anxious that I had taken ascendancy of the planning, she was abashed that I didn’t apperceive what I was accomplishing (even admitting I was accomplishing a lot of accident planning at the time). Truthfully, I anticipate she was abashed that I wasn’t traveling to account their traditions. She couldn’t accept been added wrong. My fiancé and I gave this a abundant accord of thought, and I anticipate we came up with a admirable marriage that acquainted appropriate to both of us. We fabricated abiding to brainwash anybody in the allowance by accomplishing little things (like a affairs for the abbey service, which was conducted in Greek).
The greatest acclaim I’ve anytime accustomed was from my mother-in-law the day afterwards the party, if she told me it was the a lot of admirable party gowns that she’d anytime be abounding and that she would never agnosticism me afresh (and for the a lot of part, she’s kept accurate to her word!) We begin the best DJ for Greek and non-Greek music, we included Greek traditions like the august “tearing of the bread,” we were affiliated in a Greek Orthodox church. I even fabricated a accent in Greek! Our accompany performed the Neil Diamond song for my ball with my father, we anesthetized on the heavy, expected, midnight candied table in favour of marriage cake, beginning bake-apple and chocolate-covered strawberries. We didn’t decay money on bonbonnieres. (You know, those statuettes and account frames that never bout your adornment and are abashing up the basement!) Our cocktail hour was alfresco (that was exceptional of at the time). We captivated our accession at a admirable area that cipher had been to afore and had a romantic, fun, absolute summer party.